He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
