just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
