is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
