Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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