i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
