I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I need water and some morals
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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