We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Randomize