Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
