Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
They have beer where we have blood.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
