there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
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