We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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