hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
