Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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