Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
