dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
