Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
FUCK WHALES
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
