Sponge bath it is.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
