Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
