What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
