heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
