I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize