I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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