garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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