it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just googled if crying burns calories
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
