This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize