Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think my vagina is haunted
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
