Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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