Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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