he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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