there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
