what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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