We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
