You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
