whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize