sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
