is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
