my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
