I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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