So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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