Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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