also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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