You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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