# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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