we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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