Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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