the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
