If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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