Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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