Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
