Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
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